


Dallas Winston is a Clueless Woman

by dontleavemehigh



Category: The Outsiders - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Complicated Relationships, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Genderbending, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, I swear it has a happy ending, Implied Sexual Content, It doesn't get that far though, Lesbian Dallas Winston, Lesbian Johnny Cade, Making Out, Miscommunication, Pre-Canon, Useless Lesbians, kind of out of character but in a good way, they talk shit out though :)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:15:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28200738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontleavemehigh/pseuds/dontleavemehigh
Summary: Dallas Winston already knew that she felt something for Johnnie Cade, but she never thought about it for too long. She was so sure that Johnnie would never like her as anything more than a friend, until they spent a few minutes alone at the Curtis' house. After that, she wasn't sure about anything anymore.
Relationships: Johnny Cade/Dallas Winston
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	1. Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything is from Dallas's point of view. Their names will be Dallas and Johnnie, but the rest of the gang are still boys. It still takes place in 1965, but is set a few weeks before Johnnie first gets jumped by the Socs.

Dallas's feet ached as she made it up to the Curtis's porch. She had been sleeping at Buck's for the whole week, and it was a long walk back and forth between the two places. But she did it anyway, just to see everyone. That day was different, though, since she only really wanted to see Johnnie. 

She didn't bother knocking, because she didn't knock for anybody, and instead she simply strolled in, without a word. Surely enough, there was Johnnie Cade, sitting right at the dining table. 

"Hey, Johnnie." Dallas said as she bit back a grin. Johnnie was giving her a soft look that they both knew was saying _take off your shoes, Dally,_ but she didn't. That was what a Soc would've done; Socs with clean houses that had to stay clean. Ones way different from the Curtis's, with its wooden floors, which always had some kind of shit on them. Even after Darry, Soda, and Ponyboy scrubbed them the best they could.

"Hi Dallas," Johnnie said back with a meek smile. Dallas wondered why, before looking over at the kitchen counter. There was a big greasy pan on the stove and a big empty bowl next to it, with a single scrap inside, of what looked like scrambled eggs.

She rolled her eyes, stuffing her hands into her pockets. "They couldn't leave any for me? Bunch of animals.." Dallas shoved the door shut behind her, walking over to Johnnie and sitting down next to her.

"I can uh, make you something if you want.." Johnnie offered, fidgeting with her hands under the table. She was always thinking about Dally and the others, emphasis on Dally, even if she knew they didn't really need her.

Dallas grabbed the pack of cigarettes laying on the table, which was probably Darry's, and pulled out one of the cancer sticks, holding it in her hand. "I can take care of myself, Johnnie. You got a lighter?" Her and the other greasers could take care of themselves just fine. Not that Johnnie couldn't take care of herself, the others just liked taking care of her. Dallas especially.

But that wasn't anything new. Everyone in the gang knew that Dallas was soft on her, even if she had never said it out loud. She showed it in the looks she gave Johnnie, or the way she would hold her close when she had just gotten a beating. 

Dallas watched Johnnie as she stood up, pushing in her chair and heading over to the kitchen to grab a lighter. She turned around in her seat, just to watch her rummage through the kitchen drawers.

Her eyes wandered to her jean skirt, and down her smooth, tan legs. "Why are you here alone, Johnnie? Don't you have to be at school?" She asks, her icy gaze focusing back on the cigarette between her fingers. 

Johnnie glanced back at her, and her smile cracked. Dallas immediately regretted asking. "I'm alright spending time with you. I'm just wondering why you're here." She reassured the girl in the kitchen, even if it was a bit out of character for her.

Sure, the gang knew how she felt about Johnnie, but there was a way that Dallas acted around her with them, and around her when they were alone. If she hugged her close in front of the others, she'd hug her even closer when they were alone at the lot. As long as no one else saw, she was fine with it. So was Johnnie.

"School's out. Darry's working, Ponyboy's hanging with Soda and Steve, and I don't know where Two-Bit is, but he isn't here." Johnnie answered, turning around to face Dallas once she found a lighter. Dallas stood up with a smirk, making her way over to the kitchen. 

"That there looks like Tim Shepard's lighter." She said with a chuckle, taking it out of Johnnie's hand and staring closely at it. Written at the bottom of it in black sharpie were the initials 'T.S', but Dallas already knew that. She had taken it from his pocket a few days back. 

Johnnie didn't seem to get it, but after seeing the look on Dallas's face, she knew she had stolen the lighter. "You should give it back," Johnnie murmured as she watched the other girl light up her cancer stick, taking a long puff from it. "He's gonna know you took it."

Dallas brushed a few tufts of pale blonde hair away from her eyes, blowing the smoke out the window. "You worried about me, Johnnie-cake?" She teased, finishing the cigarette before turning on the radio. The Beatles started to play, and one of their more upbeat songs was on. "Come on, you know I can handle him."

Johnnie wasn't convinced. She didn't say a word, until Dallas scooped her up in her arms with ease. Her face went red and she let out a gasp, starting to struggle against her. "Dallas!" It only made the other girl laugh. If Dallas was being honest, she wanted to hear Johnnie say that again, in a much different setting, with a lot less clothing on. Good thing honesty wasn't something she was known for.

"Dallas Winston, you let go of me right now!" Before Dallas knew it, she was acting like Two-Bit. "Why don't you make me, Johnnie-cake?" If it were anyone else, Johnnie would've been as still as a statue in her arms. She'd be afraid to get hit, or yelled at. That's how Dallas knew she wasn't just anyone else, because Johnnie wasn't afraid of her.

Dallas wasn't blind. She could tell that Johnnie liked her the most, and she thought it was nice. Dallas liked her the most, too. She even let her guard down, when they were alone. She was sweet, and warm, and Johnnie was loud, and feistier with her. 

After a few moments, when Johnnie was so flushed she looked like was was going to be sick, she was finally put back down. "You alright, Johnnie?" Dallas laughs, and she pants softly, before gently hitting her in the shoulder. If it was Tim or a Soc she would've hit them back three times as hard, but not Johnnie. She'd shoot herself in the foot before she ever hurt Johnnie.

"I'm okay, but if you ever do that again, I swear I'll tell Darry." She pulls her skirt down a bit, before turning up the volume of the radio.

 _"Well shake it up baby, now!"_ John Lennon sung loudly, and Dallas tensed up as she watched Johnnie flinch. She was so jumpy, like she always thought something bad was going to happen to her. Dallas wished she could kick the shit out of her folks for making her feel like that. 

There was no one around to watch Dallas be soft with Johnnie, so she grabbed her hands, holding them in hers. Dancing always made both of them feel better. "Dally?" Johnnie whispers. "What's happening?" 

"We're gonna dance, that's what's happening." She squeezes her hands tightly, and Dallas could see her starting to smile as they danced around the kitchen.

Johnnie giggles, for the first time in a long while. She fucking giggles, and Dallas wants to swing her around the room and love on her the way that everyone else loved on their girlfriends. She had to tell herself over and over again that Johnnie wasn't her girlfriend, and that she wasn't hers either.

It was a sad, stupid thought, even if it was true. It was good that Dallas remembered it. If she didn't, she might've forgotten that Johnnie gave everyone else the same smile, and the same giggles, and the same goddamn blush. She might act differently around her, but that was only because she was like her big sister. Her best friend.

Dallas felt Johnnie watching her, and she looked away from her before she could figure her out. She read people too easily, and it wasn't always at the best of times.

She thought, maybe if she didn't think about it, the thoughts would go away. But then she raised their arms up and Johnnie twirled, only to fall forward onto Dallas. Neither of them saw it coming, and together they fell to the floor.

Dallas's head hit the kitchen cupboards, and she winces, catching Johnnie and yanking her forward by her hips. She wanted her to land on something softer than the hard floor. "Fuck," Dallas cursed as she rubbed the back of her head. 

"Dally! Dally are you okay?" Johnnie asked frantically, her hands cupping Dallas's cheeks and turning her face up. Her face was flushed pink, and her icy eyes were wide with shock, while her pale hands held Johnnie's waist.

Johnnie's eyes were soft as she reached down with her thumb, brushing Dallas's hair off of her forehead. Her own hair was wavy and black, and it went halfway down her shoulders, while Dallas's was short and blonde and a lot messier. It stopped just above her neck, and Johnnie always helped her cut it when it got long. She was the only one allowed to touch it. Dallas even smacked Steve when he tried to ruffle it.

Dallas could feel her face getting hotter as Johnnie tangled one of her hands on the hair behind her head. It was getting longer, and she couldn't help but notice. Dallas didn't say a word. Not yet. She was Dallas Winston, after all. Dallas Winston didn't get flustered.

"What are you doing, kid?" She grunted, knowing damn well that Johnnie hated when she called her that. Dallas was hoping it would make her let go and get off, but it didn't. It was like she ignored it on purpose.

The sun hit her face through the open window, and her black eyes light up into a nice, dark brown. Her tan skin looked like it was shining, almost like gold. "I'm not doing anything, Dallas." She said it in a cocky, teasing way, that made Dallas want to kiss her as hard as she could. She scoffed, reaching up to Johnnie's hair, and grasping it in her hand.

They shared a laugh as Johnnie combed her fingers through her hair. "I'm just thinking, that's all." She murmured, and Dallas suddenly understood.

Johnnie was thinking about _her,_ of all people. Because she was in love. It was the best feeling she had ever felt in her life, until the dread kicked in.

Christ, why did it have to be her? 

__________

Dallas was kicking a broken beer bottle. She glared it as it rolled through the alley, all the way onto the street. She hoped that a Soc would run over it, and pop a tire.

She was still trying to find Johnnie, because she didn't know where the hell she was. Dallas had already looked around at the school, and down at the lot, but she couldn't find her. She had smoked half a pack of cigarettes by the time she got down to Johnnie's street, from how stressed she was.

 _"Dally, please."_ Johnnie had begged Dallas the other day. She knew she could say no to her, but she really didn't want to. After a few minutes of messing with her, Dallas said, _"Sure, Johnnie-cake."_ And watched with a smirk as she ran off elsewhere. Dallas teased her more than anyone else in the gang, but Johnnie didn't mind.

She made Dallas promise to spend some time with her, after she got out of school. Dallas remembered the way her face flushed when she asked her, and she remembered her smile. Like Dallas was the sweetest girl in the world. She was the last person in the gang that deserved that smile, but if Johnnie could look at her like that, then maybe there was something about her that wasn't completely ruined.

Johnnie was like that. She made Dallas wonder if maybe her life was maybe worth something, even when she was the most rotten greaser in town.

It had been a whole week since they hung out at the Curtis's house, and Dallas needed to tell her that she couldn't love her. She just couldn't. Dallas knew that love wasn't wrong, even if they were both girls, but loving _her_ was. 

She hurt people. She had done worse than that, too. She was a troublemaker, a hood, and a criminal. She was Dallas Winston, and she was a monster. She just didn't know how she could tell Johnnie that.

"There you are." She sighed, looking over at Johnnie's front porch, where Johnnie herself was sitting quietly. No wonder Dallas couldn't find her. She didn't think to check at the place she hated most in the world.

Dallas took out another cigarette as she walked over to her, finishing it quickly, before stomping it into the sidewalk. Johnnie heard her footsteps, and she looked up, relaxing when she saw that it was only Dallas.

"I've been looking everywhere for you, Johnnie." She said bitterly, and Johnnie had the sense to look somewhat embarrassed. She glanced down at the instrument in her hands, only able to shrug softly in response. "Sorry Dally, I thought I told you my folks aren't home today.." She said after a while, biting her lip hard. Dallas could tell she was on edge, and even if she was upset, she lightened up. For Johnnie's sake.

She dug her hands into the pockets of her jeans, sitting down beside Johnnie on the steps. She scooted over, giving Dallas some more room. "It's alright, Johnnie-cake. I was just worried you were.. well, here." She blushes, and Dallas looks away from her.

"..what's with the thing?" She asked, not really sure what to call the instrument in Johnnie's hands. All she knew was that it looked like a small guitar, and that Elvis Presley had one.

Johnnie smiled at her question, and she held up the ukulele, showing it to Dallas. "I found it at the lot, after you went to Buck's yesterday. It's kind of beat up, but I learned how to play something on it." She was always doing some kind of hobby, since she didn't have much else to do. She didn't understand her homework, and she didn't always get to hang out with the gang, so she did a lot of other things. Dallas had even taught her how to shoot, when Johnnie asked.

Dallas smirked at that. "So, you just wanted to show it to me?" Johnnie blushed again, and it made Dallas want to melt, but she knew there was something else planned. She could tell from the way that Johnnie was fidgeting that there was more going on.

"I wanted to play something for you, Dallas." She had a bad feeling, and suddenly Dallas knew why she was there with her, alone. "Don't you want to show the whole gang? Come on, we'll go down to show everyone-" She was trying to get out of it, and was beginning to stand up, when Johnnie grabbed her.

"I- I only wanna play it for you, Dally.." Johnnie had a great voice, and sometimes she sung for the gang, when they were sitting down at the lot or just having fun with each other, but she'd never sung just for Dallas before. 

It was going to be some kind of confession. Some sappy love song that fit Johnnie perfectly, that told Dallas how she really felt about her. If it got up to that point, Dallas would have to reject her, and she wanted to nip it in the bud before that could happen. Before she could break Johnnie's heart.

"For me? Are you sure?" Johnnie gave her a look, and Dallas sat back down next to her. "Alright, alright. Whenever you're ready, Johnnie.." Her stomach churned as she watched her slender fingers positioning themselves on the ukulele, taking a few moments to find the notes.

She started to play a soft, simple song. Dallas didn't recognize it, until she started to sing.

Dallas's eyes were stuck on Johnnie's lips as she sung the lyrics, some song by The Ronettes that she had heard way too many times on the radio. She sung sweetly, her fingers strumming all the right chords as she got lost in her own little world.

Johnnie deserved her own little world. Or at least, Dallas thought so. Her own little world, away from all of the shit that she had to deal with.

Soon, her eyes met Dallas's, and she began to scoot closer to her. Dallas wanted to move back, furious at herself for getting so comfortable in the first place. Johnnie's blush only got worse, going from a light pink to a gorgeous red, but she continued to stare up at Dallas. It seemed she was determined to not back down.

Dallas didn't dare move as their thighs pressed together, and Johnnie sounded so pretty that she wanted to have a record of it. What she wouldn't pay for that. 

Eventually, Johnnie trailed off, her playing ceasing. She put the ukulele down, her hands settling in her lap, shaking gently. "You're alright, Johnnie-cake. You're alright." Was all Dallas told her, when really she wanted to hold her and kiss her and tell her that she loved her.

Johnnie looked around for a quick second, just to make sure that there was no one listening to them. If anyone heard what she was about to say, she'd be beaten by them for sure. To say nothing of what her parents would do to her, if they ever found out. 

"I think I'm like you, Dally." She said quietly, wrapping her arms around Dallas and pulling her close. "I think I'm a dyke, too.. I'm sorry, I've been wantin' to tell you for a while. I was just scared." Johnnie explained, and Dallas nodded, her hands resting on Johnnie's back.

Her face was pressed into Dallas's neck as she took the other girl's pale hands, placing them on her lower back. Almost instantly, she yanked them back, pulling herself up to her feet. Johnnie's eyes were wide as she reached for Dallas, only to grasp the air as Dallas stepped back.

"I have to go, kid." She felt bile rising in her throat, and it burned like whiskey as she swallowed it back down. "Please don't," Johnnie pleaded. "I'm sorry."

"I know." Dallas looked down at the ground, afraid of what she would see if she looked up. "I'll see you around."

And before she knew it, she was running away.

__________

Dallas had been drinking. She had been drinking a lot, ever since she ran away from Johnnie.

She didn't know how long it had been since she had ran away, but she didn't want to know. The only thing she cared about was where she was, and how much alcohol was there. Considering she was passed out in her own bed, there was none.

With a grunt, Dallas rolled out of bed, in just her bra and some jeans. She pulled on her leather jacket, zipping it up, and heading over to the kitchen. She went for her old man's liquor stash in the pantry, cursing when she found it empty.

"Fuck," She swore, slamming the pantry door shut and going back to her bedroom, yanking on a pair of boots. It seemed she was going to have to leave the house for booze, that time. 

Dallas went to Buck's, not saying a thing as she walked into his house. He didn't say a thing either, seeing as she always showed up without asking. As long as she gave him a few bills as thanks, he let her.

Buck was the only real friend she had, outside of Tim, and.. Johnnie.

The gang weren't really her friends. Greasers called each other bud or pal or family, if they were close enough, but Dallas wasn't exactly a greaser. So she just called them her gang, even if they were practically her family. Johnnie, on the other hand..

Dallas huffed, running a hand through her hair. Even hungover and half drunk, she couldn't go three seconds without thinking about her. She needed something to drink.

"Buck, do ya' have any booze?" She rubbed one of her eyes, and he chuckled, shaking his head. "Naw, just ran out. But don't worry Dal, I'm havin' a party tonight. Everyone's bringing something to drink." There were footsteps coming up to the door, and he flashed Dallas a smirk. "Speak of the devil." 

When Buck went to open the door, a couple of college kids came in, one of them holding a small thing of whiskey. Dallas didn't even blink as she marched over.

"Hey now- give it back!" He hollered as Dallas snatched the bottle out of his hands. "I need it more than you do," She growled, socking him in the face before climbing up the stairs as fast as she could. She needed a drink, and she needed it quick.

Dallas went into her usual room, slamming the door behind her. She twisted off the cap of the whiskey, ignoring the way her palm stung as she threw it across the room. She held the bottle up to her lips, gulping it down as fast as she could. It hit her hard, but it didn't burn nearly as much as when she said those words to Johnnie.

"I have to go, kid..I know, I'll see you around.." She repeated out loud, taking another swig afterwards.

She wished she was like Johnnie, who was out like a light anytime she even touched booze. It took a lot to make Dallas really drunk, and she hated it.

"I'm a mess." She grumbled, letting out a dry laugh. "You hear that, Johnnie? You made me a mess. I hope you're fucking happy." Another thought of Johnnie, another drink.

Dallas had downed half of the bottle by the time music started playing from downstairs. It wasn't much, and she knew it'd take a lot more than the one bottle to get her drunk. She wasn't even in the mood for whiskey anymore.

She set the bottle on the nightstand, wiping her wet lips on the sleeve of her jacket before heading back down to the party.

 _"Do you think I look tuff in this?"_ Johnnie asked her once, as she pulled on the brown leather jacket. She was freezing, and Dallas didn't want her to get pneumonia, so she gave the jacket to her. They were at the lot on a cold night, and it was dark, so she couldn't see how red Dallas's face was.

 _"You sure look tuff in it, Dal. I wish I could be tuff like you."_ Dallas told Johnnie to shut up after that, and she flinched, hands retreating into the pockets of the jacket. It hurt so badly to watch, Dallas still thought that punching a brick wall would've been less painful.

 _"Sorry, Johnnie-cake. I didn't mean to scare ya', but.. you don't want to be tuff like me. I'm too tuff."_ Johnnie didn't say anything for a few seconds. Dallas didn't know if it was because she was thinking of what to say or because she was busy zipping up the jacket, but either way she ending up saying the same thing. _"I don't think you're too tuff. Not to me."_

Dallas shivered at the memory, taking her mind off of it by going over to the kitchen, where there was a big clump of bottles spilling out all over the counter. She drank, and drank, and drank, before going back upstairs. She still couldn't get Johnnie out of her head, so she decided to sleep it off. Things would be better in the morning. That's what she told herself over and over again, even if she didn't believe it.

__________

"Dallas." Buck called from the doorway. There was a soft love song playing from downstairs, one that Dallas knew very well.

"Dal, how much did you drink?" After she sat up, Dallas put two and two together, realizing that if there was still music, that she hadn't slept through the entire night. It wasn't even midnight yet. "I don't know, man.." She looked over at Buck, who was standing just outside the room, cracking the door open.

"Johnnie's here with me." He said out of nowhere. "Do you wanna see her?" Dallas nearly had a heart attack right then and there. The words came out of her mouth before she could stop them.

"Of course I want to fucking see her!" She snapped, stopping quickly when Buck gave her a look. Her hands were gripping the bed sheets so tightly, they were starting to shake. "..yeah, yeah. Just send her in, Buck." Dallas was beginning to regret all of the drinks she had had that night. If she had been more sober, she wouldn't have been any less nervous, but at least she would've been able to keep it together.

He nudged her inside, closing the door behind her and walking off. Johnnie was dressed in worn blue jeans and a black blouse, and her arms were covered in a few dozen bruises, along with a big, pink hand print on the side of her face.

"Hey, Dally." Johnnie whispered. They didn't talk about what had happened. They both knew.

"Hey, Johnnie." Dallas slowly reached forward, cautiously taking Johnnie's hand in hers. Johnnie let her pull her down to the bed, so that they could sit together. They were holding hands, but it was nothing compared to the comfort that Johnnie deserved.

Dallas had never felt worse, than when she looked down at Johnnie's black, empty eyes. There were dark circles underneath them, that weren't there when Dallas had sat down with her on her porch. 

She had done that to her. She had put those circles under her eyes. "How long has it been, since I left?" She was afraid to hear the answer. Johnnie only smiled sadly. "Ten days." She answered bluntly, squeezing Dallas's hands tightly. She didn't want her to leave again.

"I'm sorry." Dallas wanted Johnnie to hate her. To yell at her and curse her out and tell her that she never wanted to see her again. It was what she deserved, and it would be so much easier, if Johnnie just hated her. She wouldn't have to break her heart. Instead, her dark eyes lit up when she heard her apology. Johnnie thought they were going to have a moment, and they were, but it wouldn't be pleasant for either of them.

"Why did you do it, Dallas?" She didn't want to answer. She tried to pay attention to the love song coming from downstairs, not that it made anything any better.

They sat there in silence, besides having Elvis in the background, while Dallas stared down at Johnnie's hands. They were both soft and calloused, and looking at them was better than looking up at Johnnie herself. They used to be able to hug and hold each other close. But because Dallas knew what she knew, they couldn't do that anymore.

"I did it for the same reason that I'm only holding your hands," She said as she rubbed her thumb over Johnnie's knuckles. "If I do anything more, I won't be able to stop myself."

Johnnie blushed, her cheeks becoming a deep red. "I don't want you to stop, Dal." She reached up, cupping her cheek. Dallas took her hand, pulling it away as she shook her head. "Johnnie, we can't do this." She used her other hand to grasp at Dallas's hair, which Dallas quickly pinned back to her side.

"Johnnie, I'm a fucking loser. I'm mean, and I'm cold, and I'm the last person you should be in love with." Dallas said as Johnnie watched her closely. "Too bad," She huffed, yanking her hand away from Dallas's grip. "Because I love you. And it sounds like you love me too." She loved her spunk, more than anything, but it was a pain in the ass, at moments like that.

"I'm drunk." She would've said anything, to make her stop. She was so desperate for her to keep going, and for her to stop. Everything hurt so badly, and Dallas wanted it to end. "No, you're not." Dallas let out a scoff, like it was funny. Johnnie was right. She was drunk, sure, and definitely out of it, but she would remember everything the next morning. She wasn't that wasted, but Johnnie didn't need to know that. 

"Yeah, I fucking am." Dallas grabbed her wrists once again, forcing her to sit still, but Johnnie still didn't stop trying whatever the fuck she was trying. "I'm an angry drunk, _Johnnie._ " She spat out her name, like it was some sort of insult, and she started to shake. "No, you're _not._ " She was relentless, with her words like daggers and her stare that saw right through Dallas.

She knew what she had to do, to break Johnnie. To drive her away, forever, even. Before Dallas even did anything, she had to tell herself over and over again that she was doing this because she had to. Because Johnnie Cade _couldn't_ fall in love with her. She couldn't drag her down to her level. Johnnie deserved so much more than that.

Dallas grabbed her torso, slamming her back into the wall. Her lower back dug into the headboard while her upper back hit the wall, causing her to cry out. Dallas was holding onto her wrists so tightly, she was surprised that Johnnie hadn't started to squirm. "Yes, I _am._ " She insisted, and Johnnie went silent. Her back would be aching for a few hours after, and Dallas knew that. It was important that it did. So that Johnnie would never fall for her, ever again.

" _Say it, Johnnie._ " She snarled, pressing their foreheads together, while she stared down with the coldest glare she had ever given anyone in her entire life. She had absolutely ruined everything that they had. Dallas was sure that Johnnie would never want to speak to her ever again, and that was what she wanted. She wanted her to find someone better. Someone that actually deserved Johnnie.

A few minutes had passed. Johnnie hadn't said anything, despite Dallas's chilling words. By then, she just couldn't do it anymore. She dropped her wrists, and slowly, her eyes began to water. Dallas let out a pathetic sob as she was hugged by Johnnie. A goodbye, of course. To everything they used to have.

But Johnnie didn't let go.

She wrapped her arms around Dallas's neck, and finally, Dallas let her.

And then, their lips met.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pleaseee leave comments :)) I love hearing feedback on my works and they really help me stay motivated. Give me ideas for my next works too, if you can!


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> making out, miscommunications, and insecurities, oh my!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: underage making out, implied smut  
> **I'm not adding the underage warning to the work, though, because it doesn't really count?? It's not anything more than you'd read in the script of a steamy PG-13 scene, really.

_And then, their lips met._

Dallas didn't know what to do. That wasn't supposed to happen, not at all. Johnnie should've been crying or yelling or running away, but instead she was pinned underneath Dallas, kissing her.

Johnnie's lips were gentle, but passionate as they moved against Dallas's. "It's okay," Johnnie said as she cupped her cheeks, wiping away the tears running down her face. "You don't gotta' cry anymore." She kissed her again, hands tangled in her blonde locks.

For a few minutes, Dallas didn't move at all. But slowly, her hands lifted up from the bed sheets, sliding up to Johnnie's slim waist. "That's it," Johnnie praised as she pulled away for a quick breath. "Go ahead. I'm not gonna' stop you."

That was the problem, of course. Dallas had worked so, so hard to keep her away, and now that she had a taste of Johnnie, she wasn't sure that she could stop herself. Did she even want to, anymore? Even when she had hurt her, Johnnie had stayed. She wasn't going to leave, no matter what Dallas did.

Everything she had done to keep Johnnie at a distance, she had done to ensure that she would find someone better. Someone that was safer, and kinder, and softer than Dallas. That was the goal, after all. But what was she supposed to do, when it all fell apart? Johnnie had made it clear that she wasn't going to look for someone better. She had made it clear that all she wanted was Dallas.

She put her thoughts on hold for a moment, thoughtfully looking down at Johnnie as a distraction. She felt up her hips, and her love handles, that made her insides pool with warmth. 

She didn't mean to kiss her. She didn't, even when she wanted to. And yet somehow, Dallas's lips found Johnnie's, and she kissed her as hard as she could.

Her lips were intoxicating, and Dallas loved her touch even more. Even the way her nails raked under her shirt, against the pale skin of her back drove her crazy. Johnnie let out a groan as she was pressed against the mattress, quietly chuckling when Dallas started to kiss her neck.

"Is something about this funny, Johnnie?" Dallas asked as she paused, staring right into the eyes of the girl beneath her. The look in her eyes was lustful and dangerous, and Johnnie might have been worried, if she wasn't so excited by it.

"Yeah," Johnnie muttered as her hands messed with Dallas's hair. "You're Dallas Winston, and you're kissing me." Dallas laughed at that, biting down and getting a moan out of Johnnie. She didn't even bother trying to hide her smirk.

"Is there something wrong with being Dallas Winston, Johnnie Cade?" Johnnie shivered, when she heard her own name like that. Meanwhile, Dallas's fingers were making their way up her shirt, brushing against every one of her ribs, up to the clasp of her bra.

"No, no.. it's just.. you're perfect.. to me, anyhow." Johnnie arched her back just a bit, making sure Dallas didn't have any trouble with her bra. They were a lot more than just words, and hearing Johnnie say them alarmed Dallas.

Slowly, like before, she pulled Johnnie closer, which made both of them blush. "Perfect? You think I'm perfect?" Johnnie could only shrug, smiling shamelessly. "I know you get into trouble, and you lie, and you start fights, but.. you're a good person, Dal. I know you are." She tried to kiss her, again, but Dallas didn't let her.

"You can't be serious." She scoffed, brows furrowing in disbelief. There was no way she was a good person, and there was no way Johnnie could think that. "Johnnie, I do those things because I'm _not_ a good person." Dallas insisted as she pulled her hands away, still in a bit of shock. "Why would you say that?"

Dallas had thought that Johnnie _knew_ she wasn't perfect; she just fell for her, anyway. "Well.. yes, you've hurt people, and you've broken a lot of laws, but.. when you get the chance to do good things, you do. And you're so good to me.." Johnnie really was speaking her mind, and Dallas couldn't stand it.

"Just stop it." She whispered as she stood up, turning away from her. Johnnie had never been more confused as she watched Dallas step away from the bed, trying her best to smooth out her crinkled shirt.

When she looked back, her eyes didn't meet Johnnie's. They stared at her neck instead, where there was a light purple mark. Left by Dallas herself, of course. "Sorry." She mumbled, looking back down to her own shirt. One of the buttons had come undone, by accident.

Johnnie only got more confused. "Sorry? Sorry for what?" She stood up as well, going up to Dallas and holding onto her arm. "Why'd you stop?"

She didn't answer her, at first. There were so many things to talk about, and still, she had to choose her next words very carefully.

"That was a mistake." Was what she came up with. Johnnie's smile dropped, though she still remained hopeful, if only for a few seconds. "Oh, the mark.." She said knowingly, pulling one of her hands away from Dallas's arm to press on the side of her neck.

"It's okay, I can cover it up just fine." Her smile returned, and she stood up on her toes, kissing Dallas on her jaw. "Come on, let's lie down again, alright?" Johnnie had always been able to read people, especially Dallas, but she was practically blinded by her want for affection. She couldn't see how upset the other girl was.

It was only when Dallas turned to look at her, that she saw that there was more to it. "Dallas?" Johnnie whispered, eyes shining with worry. "What's wrong?" She watched closely as Dallas bent over, grabbing her jacket that was lying on the floor. "Dal, what is it?"

"It's this." She said sternly, pulling the jacket on and pushing her arms through the sleeves. "It's us, Johnnie. I shouldn't have kissed you, it was wrong. I have to go."

Johnnie's whole face had gone pale, the rosy flush in her cheeks long gone. They were having such a nice time, weren't they? They were having a perfect time, and then..

"Is it because of what I said?" She asked, doing her best not to sound too.. desperate. "You told me to stop, before. Is it because I said you were perfect?" Dallas tensed up, and Johnnie knew she was right. "I didn't really mean you were perfect, Dal. No one's actually perfect, but you're my kind of perfect."

She wasn't just being sweet; she really did think that Dallas was perfect, despite everything that she did. And Dallas hated it. "I shouldn't _be_ your kind of perfect, Johnnie. That's.." She stopped, just to sigh. "That's fucked up. I'm fucked up, and I'm nowhere _near_ perfect." Dallas moved to head out of the room, but Johnnie stumbled over to the door, standing in front of it.

"What the hell, Dal?" She didn't know why Dallas was being so difficult; everyone had their opinions. Even if Dallas didn't think she was perfect, Johnnie did, and she was allowed to think that. Dallas would just have to deal with it. "Come on, you aren't being serious, are you?"

It was Dallas's turn to be shocked, then. "Of course I'm being serious. How can you say any of those things about me?" Johnnie couldn't believe what she was hearing. "So you're just going to leave? We could talk about this, and work this out, but you're just going to leave?"

Johnnie was right, and Dallas knew that. But she didn't want to be there when Johnnie realized that she _wasn't_ perfect, in any sense of the word. She didn't want to be there, to she how disappointed and angry she would be. Disappointed, that Dallas wasn't what she thought she was, and angry, that she had wasted so much time and energy on her. 

"Yeah, I am just gonna leave." All of the booze she had had earlier was really coming back to bite her, because her head began to feel heavy, and the room was starting to spin. She didn't even notice how heartbroken Johnnie looked.

The poor girl started to tremble, as she glared up at Dallas. She was starting to piece things together, but they weren't the right things. "Do you think it's funny, to mess with me like this?" Her nails dug into her palms as she spoke angrily. Dallas gave her an odd look, not understanding her at all.

"I'd never mess with you, Johnnie." She said honestly, confused by what she had said. "I'm just.. I'm fucked up. Whether you think so or not. And I know that there's no trying to reason with you, so I'm leaving." She was drunkenly trying to make things better, but it was clearly only making things worse.

At the moment, Johnnie was giving her a stare so fiery it could rival Cherry Valance's. "Dallas, I don't _care_ if you're.. if you're fucked up! You don't get to make these kinds of decisions for me!" She exclaimed, her face beginning to gain its color back.

Dallas had never heard Johnnie snap. She had hardly ever heard her even raise her voice, so her eyes were wide as she listened to every loud word that came out of her mouth. "I want to be with you, whether you're fucked up or not!"

She was frozen in place as she watched Johnnie shake and clench her fists, still glaring at her relentlessly. She soon lost her fire, as she began to cry. "Don't you want to be with me?" Johnnie sobbed, hands reaching out to Dallas's collar, grabbing onto her and pulling her close.

When Dallas didn't reply, Johnnie had taken it the worst way. Of course she had gone and ruined it; ruining whatever she touched was the only thing she could do right.

When they met, she thought that Dallas was already ruined, and that she would never be able to do anything to her. But she found that Dallas was perfect, even with her lengthy record and infamous reputation. And she found that Dallas liked to hang around her, out of more than just pity, which meant the world to her.

But then she had ruined it, somehow.

She hadn't ruined anything, really, but Dallas was too drunk to tell her that she hadn't done anything wrong.

Johnnie let go of her, when a few minutes of silence had passed. "I'm so sorry," She whimpered, holding her head in her hands as Dallas slowly came back to reality. "What?" She questioned, ignoring the extreme pounding in her head. "I'll go." Was all Johnnie said as she opened the door, much to Dallas's alarm.

"Johnnie!" She yelled, watching as Johnnie bolted down the stairs, pushing through the crowded living room to get to the front door.

Almost immediately, Dallas realized that she couldn't let her go. Even if she hated herself, and she didn't think she would ever come close to deserving Johnnie, she couldn't let her go. Their relationship was complicated, anyone could see that, but it didn't change the fact that Dallas loved Johnnie.

So, she did what anyone would have done with that realization in mind.

She ran after her.

__________

Johnnie didn't care that she was wearing her nicer shoes that night. She ran as fast as she could once she got outside, praying that Dallas would stay behind, and leave her be.

In movies, this was the part where the girl would want the boy to chase after her. But Johnnie didn't want Dallas to chase after her at all; she wanted her to move on, and find someone else, just as Dallas had wanted Johnnie to.

It was almost funny. In a few short exchanges, they had almost fully switched roles.

Soon, she was far enough away from Buck's place to stop, and take a breath. As she panted, she looked back the way she came, letting out a small, frightened noise when she saw Dallas running towards her.

"Johnnie!" She called out, not caring about the fact that they were surrounded by houses filled with sleeping greasers. Sleeping greasers who slept with blades under their pillows, ready to fight anyone who was shouting in the streets in the middle of the night.

"Go away!" Johnnie yelled as she started to run again, only to get pulled back by Dallas, who had a hard grip on her blouse.

"Johnnie, wait! I can explain everything!" Dallas frantically tried to tell her, but Johnnie didn't want to listen. She was scared of what Dallas would say about her, seeing as she was under the impression that she herself had screwed up everything she had with Dallas.

"I don't want to hear it!" She tore herself away from Dallas's touch, stumbling backwards and falling onto the hard sidewalk. "I get it! I messed everything up! I love you, and you liked me, and then I went and made you upset and I ruined it all. I know what I did, and I don't need you to tell me about it!"

Her tears didn't stop for a second, and all of it was too much for Dallas to handle. "You didn't do anything-" She paused, when Johnnie started to sob. "SHUT UP!" She screamed, wiping her face on the shoulders of her blouse. For once, Dallas did shut up, but not for long. Only long enough for Johnnie to dry her tears.

She sat there, shaking on the sidewalk as she rubbed the tears from her eyes for a good five minutes, before Dallas sat down beside her.

"Can I tell you something?" The blonde whispered, getting awfully close to her as she spoke. She didn't even wait for Johnnie to say yes.

"You didn't do anything wrong, okay? I'm the one who messed everything up. I don't know shit about going together with people. Even with Sylvia, we weren't really going together. Not like how I want to go with you. I just got upset, and wanted to leave, because I'm wrong for you, Johnnie. I break laws, and bones, too, whenever I feel like it. I'm mean and rotten and I'm a bad person, and you're so much better. You think I'm perfect, and I'm far from it. That's why I wanted you to find someone else. Someone who really is perfect. But you didn't want to, and I'm so fucking drunk, I don't even know what's going on anymore." Dallas explained, feeling relieved that everything was finally out in the open.

When she finished, Johnnie reached for her hand, holding it tightly in hers. "You're upset because I want to be with you, even if you're not perfect?" Dallas nodded, and Johnnie huffed. "I said, I want to be with you, whether you're fucked up or not." She repeated, causing Dallas to roll her eyes.

"It's not that simple. Sure, we like each other, but I'm not going to change or anything, just because I love you." Johnnie went red in the face, seeing as no one had ever told her something like that. Dallas caught on quickly, and shut her mouth before she could say anything else. She had already embarrassed herself enough.

"Dal, I know you aren't going to change. And you don't have to. It's not my job to fix you, and it's not your job to fix anything about yourself. You're good to me, and that's what matters most. That's why I said I want to be with you, even if you're fucked up."

Dallas couldn't help but laugh, when she heard that. "Can you stop calling me fucked up? It's true, but I don't appreciate it." Johnnie laughed, too. "Your words, not mine."

Dallas knew she wasn't going to be a saint anytime soon, but maybe she could be better. At least a little better, for Johnnie's sake. She didn't have to pick fights with _everyone_ she saw, and she could shoplift a little less whenever she walked into a shop. She would be able to spend a lot more time with Johnnie, if she wasn't constantly ending up in the cooler.

"So.. about before. You thought I didn't like you anymore, because I got upset that you called me out on my bullshit?" Dallas asked with a small smirk as she got up, pulling Johnnie up as well, who was frowning slightly. It was embarrassing, to hear it out loud. "It's hard to tell with you, sometimes.." Dallas's smirk wavered, and she wrapped her arms around Johnnie, hugging her close.

"Shit, I'm sorry." She whispered, kissing Johnnie's temple and continuing to hug her. "It's alright, but you scared me there. I didn't know what to think." Dallas laced her fingers with Johnnie's, as they started to walk down the street.

"Where do you want to go?" Johnnie shrugged, not caring much about where she was going to sleep with Dallas that night. "I don't care about where we sleep, as long as we get to kiss some more." Dallas chuckled, squeezing her hand. "Jesus, and here I thought you were a good girl."

Johnnie smirked, nudging Dallas's shoulder. "You can call me that in the sheets, if that's what you're into." They both laughed, even though Johnnie was blushing up to her ears. "Well then, let's just go to my place for the night." Dallas didn't hear any objections, and so, they headed off to her house, hand in hand. 

Dallas Winston is a clueless woman. She doesn't know how to deal with her complicated emotions or her many, many insecurities, but she does know that she loves Johnnie Cade. And that alone, is enough for her. They can figure out the rest, together.

__________

(+ bonus content. you thought this was over because I mentioned the title of the work? no. warning, implied smut.)

"I didn't think you were serious!" Dallas Winston, at the moment, was being pinned down to her bed by Johnnie Cade. "Serious about what? Getting to kiss you some more?" She teased, easily straddling Dallas's hips. It wasn't like she was being stopped.

"Yeah! It's one in the morning! I thought you were going to be tired, by the time we got here!" Johnnie cackled, as she unbuttoned her blouse. "Come on, don't you want to see what I'm wearing under this? It's not lingerie, but I promise, I look good in it." Dallas wasn't sure where Johnnie was getting her sudden spunk from, but it sure was hot. And Christ, she couldn't just say no.

Dallas watched silently, as Johnnie pulled off her shirt, throwing it aside. She felt bad just staring, but she wasn't entirely sure how to keep going. "Lost?" Johnnie had a smug smile on her face as she reached down, taking Dallas's hand and pressing it to the cup of her bra. "Haven't you done this before?"

She shrugged, trying to ignore the heavy blush on her face. "Yeah, it was just different. There wasn't a lot of talking involved." She grunted, as Johnnie leaned down to kiss her. "I thought you liked mouthy girls." Dallas hummed at that, running a hand through Johnnie's hair as they kissed. "I like moaning girls, more."

That _really_ got Johnnie's blood pumping, and she kissed Dallas harder, eager to speed things up. But she was stopped, when Dallas pulled her away by her hair. "I'm the one with experience here, so I think I'll take over for now." Johnnie raised an eyebrow, giggling as she watched Dallas give her a soft glare. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying get on the bed, Johnnie." She started to laugh, stopping only when Dallas put her hands on her hips, threatening to make her. "Okay, okay." Johnnie got off of her, changing positions with Dallas and laying down in her place.

They were both smiling as Dallas's hands ran all over Johnnie's body, feeling every dip and ridge, before pressing her lips to her neck. "Ready?" Her hands unclasped her bra, pulling it off and feeling her soft curves underneath.

"Ready."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you, to anyone who took the time to read this!! It's a little rushed but I hope it was still enjoyable :)) leave a comment if you want, they motivate me a lot!


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